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LOVE LESSONS

May, you came like lightning.

It was the most miserable awakening ever, since about maybe seven years ago. I didn't remember feeling this miserable. It's like my weight was all place in my heart. No solution. Helpless. The only thing a human can do is cry and then pray. That is all a human can do.

I don't know how much I can take but if God gives, that is the amount of misery and sorrow I can take. I am thankful that my loved ones are well protected and guarded. My friends are all okay, well, at least they are well physically to continue in this tough journey of life.

As I reflect, I know I'm a person without much love to give. I don't know how to love and care. Let's not even start about talking how to serve the community or finding the calling of your life or fulfilling your dreams or believing in some visions. Just love the people around you, that's already hard enough. Love the unlovable annoying friends that you have.

And I have learnt valuable lesson this week, and I hope I will always love people as if I have no chance to love them again. That is tough. But I hope.

All my life, I've been wishy washy and not sure of my wants. I can't stick to anything, and the worst, I can't stick to anybody. But now I know. I learn now that happiness can be in those little moments. Little moments that don't have to mean a lot of things. Conversation sometimes don't have to be full of 'matters of the world' or 'philosophy' but just ..... those little moments when you crack stupid jokes and laugh.

I wish to turn back time and to change circumstances. I wish that a lot.

I'm sad. I'm glad to say I'm sad instead of I'm depressed. And I know why I'm sad.

There's too many mistakes to mend.

Moments, Time, Words .... I don't want to miss these ever again, I hope.
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